I hope that someday soon you will seek out your brother and reconnect your history and love that you had for eachother. It would be healing time for you and him. I quite understand your quandary. I had a sister who ran away from our parents home when she was 18. I was 21 and married living in another state. This was in 1971, I never knew where she was until my brother called me and told me in 2010 that she had passed away. She had moved back in with our parents the prior 6 months. She had AIDS and came back to say goodbye. She was buried the day my brother called me. Our parents didn't want anyone to tell me until after the funeral because they didn't want me to get upset. I was more upset at not being told, I was LIVID! I have lost the chance of re-uniting with my sister. I took me years for me to speak with my family after that. But I and my family got past this with much difficulty because it was the right thing to do. Our relationship is not the same but we are communicating. What I'm saying is; don't wait too long to reach out to your brother, Robin. You know, it's better to have answers than to be in doubt. I beleive in you and you'll always have my support. Much love to you and sending you virtual hugs and good thoughts, Robin. 😊