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Don’t Invoke Her Dark Side
Believe me, she won’t be pretty
You suddenly become aware of a disturbance in the force. You reach out into the universe to seek out the location of the disturbance with your mind only to discover that it was in the same room as you are in. Looking around the room, you find the source, it was emanating from your significant other. She has the look (see image above) of a Sith Lord ready to force choke you into a ghostly existence. You want to avoid that kind of a situation as it is not conducive to your good health by any means. If you wish to avoid this predicament in your own life, I will provide for your edification a chapter on harmonious relationships from the ancient Jedi Master’s guide entitled, “Living with the Force.” See below…
- If your significant other is watching the Rachel Ray or Ellen Degeneres show, do not switch the channel to the ESPN. Ask her if it’s okay first. Otherwise, you are courting death!
- If she is watching anything on TV and your phone rings because your beer buddy wants to talk, take yourself and your phone to another room to continue your conversation, so as to not drown out her tv show with your loud discussions of inebriation plans with your beer friend.
- If she is in the kitchen cutting vegetables or meat, do not attempt to romantically caress or fondle any part of her because you may…
